I’m learning to not mind being as authentic as possible. As a gift to myself if anything. Being true to myself, my reality.
Why lie to the crowd? Why be someone else or pretend I am keeping up with the Jane’s and Jones’s, when I’m really a hot mess?
Why does wearing a painted mask and fronting amongst those that could give 2 shits anyway have to be it?
Do I not love myself(work in progress of it’s own)? In the here and now? Do I live a lie to make all seem better to those around me?
And why?
Pride?
Insecurity?
I am considering that the biggest form of self security one can express, is just being very legit, 100 percent, with myself and others..in a world gone fabricated and hiding behind a plethora of nice suits and tennis shoes. Little lies and exaggerations. All for who?
I’m a f-d up hot mess right now if you needed to know. I am in the in-between somewhere. It’s not always pretty. My thoughts can be shitty, I can’t stand a few..maybe many, and damn..maybe it’s just me.
F-it. š½